The mouse, the tiger and the youkai jesus
by Nezumi-chu
Summary: A story from Nazrin's POV, includes New Year's Eve event! Jealousy hurts and our Mouse youkai gets to feel it.
1. Chapter 1: Jealousy

**The mouse, the tiger and the youkai jesus**

_Chapter 1: Jealousy_

Her not me.

That sentence passed through my mind about a hundred times, yet I seemed to refuse to accept it. Lying alone in my bed once again I thought about how I would continue living normally with the way things were now. I, Nazrin, the dowser and commander of mice, for once had no idea what to do. As I was lying there I thought of how pathetic I was. I was a shame for my kind, but what was I supposed to do about the situation? No one could've done anything. Whatever. So as I was lying there I was thinking and thinking. Why couldn't I get _her_ out of my head? Why was _she_ in there? Her smile, her movements, her voice... everything was stuck in my mind and it wouldn't come out anymore. When I heard _her_ say my name my heart skipped a beat. When _she'd_ place a hand on my shoulder I felt this burning sensation. Was _she_ thinking about me when she was trying to fall asleep? Most likely not.

The only one on her mind was that other woman, Byakuren Hijiri, the youkai jesus. She had saved and helped so many people. How could I possibly blame anyone for loving her? Her walk was proud and elegant, mine was small and too normal. Her cooking was delicious and flavored with love, mine was inedible and burnt. Her smile was honest and loving, mine was rare and cold. Her body was beautiful and well shaped, mine was little and rather flat-chested. But most importantly her heart was big and self-less, while mine was small and egoistical. She had everything that I didn't have. No wonder she was loved by everyone.

It was a few months ago that I first felt this strange feeling. It wasn't that new to me, yet , I had never felt it that strongly before. Jealousy. _She_ was talking to Hijiri and they were laughing. I needed to talk to _her_ about something not that important. So they were chatting happily until I showed up. I felt like I was ruining the mood, but sadly I didn't know that it was going to be like that until I interrupted them. I asked if I was bothering and Hijiri said I wasn't and that it was fine, but _her_... Her gaze was enough to let me understand that I had entered in a bad moment and that I wasn't wanted at that point. As I left I watched them and I saw how _she _smiled at her. That smile. That smile that meant so much more than the one _she _gave me. It hurt seeing her giving it away to somebody else. And there it was. The burning feeling that ate me up. The one and only jealousy.

I never was the jealous kind of person and was able to tolerate a lot of things. But for some reason Hijiri suddenly seemed like such a bother to me. Everything remained normal to everyone else, but every smile Hijiri gave me, every nice word she sent me... they all seemed like lies. And the night following my jealous event was the first night I ever dreamed of _her_. I wonder if _she _noticed my strange behavior. How I would send _her_ one or another loving smile. And give Hijiri one or another death glare. I didn't want Hijiri to liked by everyone, especially not by _her._ But whoever would hear my jealous curses would be on the side of the youkai jesus. Because I was thinking about me and not about _her_. I never thought about what _she _wanted, just about what I wanted. But even if I hated Hijiri so much, I had to be thankful. Without her I would never have met _her_. And maybe my life would have gone a complete different way.

Awaiting slumber I heard all those thoughts circling in my head. My head hurt terribly and I wished I could get up and get myself a drink of water or something. But I couldn't. Outside my room were Hijiri and the others. Also _her._ I had left the chit-chat party early that day, because I didn't feel well. And that wasn't even an excuse. Seeing _her_ talking happily with Hijiri made me feel sick and horrible. Jealousy had struck me once again. You always except jealous people to be the bad ones. They were hated by mostly everyone, but did I deserve to be hated? I don't think so. No one deserves to be hated. But apparently master thought differently. With every small interruption in a conversation of her and her Hijiri her glare grew darker. A few days ago the captain sent me to ask her something and I had to bother her. I had never been more scared before in my life. Her gaze. That horrible, painful gaze. The hatred burning in her eyes as if it was trying to strangle me. I even forgot what the captain wanted me to ask at instant and just left startled.

Ah, it was no use. I couldn't sleep. I sat up. I didn't hear the others anymore, so at least Murasa left, being that she was the most noisy one. Ichirin would feel like she was bothering master and Hijiri if she stayed without Murasa staying as well, so she left for sure as well, taking Unzan with her... and that left Hijiri and master. They were alone now. If I interrupted now I could immediately go pack my bags to leave the temple. Which actually wasn't such a bad idea. No, I should get that out of my head. Even if I bothered her right now, I had to be a loyal underling to my master. I had to be there until she said she didn't want me there anymore. Receiving a boost of courage from that thought, I opened the door a tiny bit and peeked outside. Master was still there, but there was no sign of Hijiri. I waited a minute and then another. And before I noticed ten minutes passed as I watched my beautiful master. She was alone there. I could go to her now and confess. But that didn't even cross my mind. It would be stupid to confess to someone who's on the edge of death hating you.

Still, I wanted my drink of water and being as stubborn as I was I just opened the door completely and made a noisy yawn to make her believe that I had just woken up. I should just pretend to be tired enough to not even see her. So I turned into another direction, seeing from the corner of my eye how she looked at me surprised. I pretended to walk slowly and tiredly, my eyes half closed and my back half bent. I managed to get that desired water without anyone trying to contact me. Most likely because I didn't see anyone besides master. I headed straight back to my room, keeping the tired walk. I saw that master was still there, but pretended not to until...

"Nazrin?" Damn. Either my acting skills were sucky or she really wanted something. I looked at her with half closed eyes. "Oh, master. You're still awake?" I asked my voice dragging itself. "Yes, I couldn't sleep..." She looked like she was in thought. Sadly I knew who that thought was about. "...what about you? I guess you were too busy thinking to sleep as well, huh?" She made a little smile. I hated what I had to do now... at least I hated to do it to master, but I couldn't let her know it. I couldn't risk her finding out what I kept a secret. I had to reach into the pocket of my pajamas and pull out a lie. "No, I've been asleep already." I stretched and smiled a tiny bit, "I just woke up and felt thirsty." I explained the untruth, careful that my voice still sounded a little sleepy. I should ditch dowsing and become and actress I thought jokingly to myself. "Oh, I see. Well, good, Night, Nazrin, I hope you still have a good rest." she smiled. "Th-thank you, master." Stuttering? Damn. "Have a g-good r-rest as w-well!", and now I couldn't fight the blush anymore and disappeared quickly into my room.

What happened? She went from death glares to friendly smiles? I knew master was a little messed up sometimes, but that was just strange. Whatever. I was starting to feel tired now. My eye lids suddenly felt heavy. Apparently her wishing me a good night was like the medication to sweet slumber. And I told her good night back.

But there's one thing I could never tell her.

One phrase that could never escape my lips.

"I love you, Toramaru Shou."

* * *

*This will NOT be Anti-Byakuren, I don't love her, but I don't hate her either.

Phew, this is for a first chapter. I really love this couple and to anyone who loves it as much as me: Please review and tell me how you like this!


	2. Chapter 2: Bad mornings breakfast plans

**The mouse, the tiger and the youkai jesus**

_Chapter 2: Bad mornings and breakfast plans_

I suddenly felt something hitting my face harshly.

My eyes opened slowly and I found out that it only was a ray of sunlight, waking me up from my precious sleep. I had been dreaming so nicely about Master. How she liked me more than Hijiri and we were happy. Even though it sounds stupid, I loved it. And hey, no one can control dreams or subconscious... except for that one freaky satori who sealed her eye. A sweet smell entered my nose, giving my brain the breakfast alarm. Maybe master was the one making breakfast. If no one else was up I could take the opportunity of being alone with her to find out if she hated me. But that idea was just plain weird, because I knew master. That tiger wasn't a morning person, not at all. If anyone bothered her in the morning, she'd take one of her spellcards. Everyone was happy when their turn of waking her passed without incidents. If I was correct today was my turn.

"Hooray!" I whispered sarcastically while getting up and started to get dressed. Getting roasted by a tiger's spellcards in the morning. That was just what I needed now. I looked down on me and checked my attire. I looked as usual. I was about to leave the room before I stopped abruptly. I looked back and found that I had almost forgotten my best comrade in the basket. Poor mouse was on the edge of crying. I gasped and knelt down in front of him. "Forgive me! It'll never happen agaaaain! I could never forget you!" My fellow squeaked. "Of course it matters!" And one more squeak followed. "You forgive me? Thank you, my comrade." I felt like there was a strong stare upon me from behind, from the doorway. And even though whoever was there tried their best to fight the chuckling, I could still hear it. I needed to control my break outs more. I sighed and lifted a spellcard into the air. Mine weren't as strong, but effective, though.

I turned around and saw that I roasted Ichirin and missed the captain. Great. Both of them. I hung the basket over my tail and left my room, leaving the well cooked Ichirin and our beloved ship ghost behind. I made my way to the kitchen and found Hijiri preparing the food. "Good morning, Nazrin-chan." She said smiling at me. Damn. How could she be this nice to me? Was it some kind of torture? Not to forget about the chan at the end of my name. I didn't want to be called that. Not by her. "Thank you Hijiri-sama. It didn't start out so well, though." I said. I had to stay polite. After all I was living under her roof, eating from her food and serving her follower. From the people at the Myouren temple I was at the lower end of the food chain.

"Oh, how come? You didn't sleep well?" Though, I seemed to be liked by her in some way. At least she didn't hate me, which was good. Otherwise it might've become a bloody fight over Master. "The sleep was fine, so was the morning until I roasted nun-looking youkai." I didn't feel like being polite to someone who made fun of me and Ichirin wasn't THAT high on the Myouren temple- or the Gensokyou food chain. "Roasted?" The youkai jesus seemed a little shocked, but managed to keep her cool perfectly. Amazing how she could, I would have freaked out if my follower's servant used a spellcard on another follower. So either I had a really hard time controlling my anger or Hijiri could just do it way too perfectly. I considered the last explanation to be more possible and just went with that one. "Yes, roasted. She and Murasa were apparently making fun of me and I really didn't need that." "I-Is she alright?", Byakuren seemed worried, taking her eyes off me and gazing towards the kitchen door in hope someone would enter.

I yawned, but covered my mouth. "She should be. I used a spellcard of mine. My spellcards are weak and I still used one of my weakest ones." At that moment a tastily roasted Ichirin entered, followed by our captain, who seemed to also make fun of Ichirin, proving me that I shouldn't take it personally as long as it was from the captain. "Morning, Hijiri and Nazrin, even though I saw you before." She shortly glanced my way before looking at Hijiri, who was surprised by the roasted look of her follower. "Good morning to you too, captain... Ichirin, are you alright?" I saw a small nod from her, she was over the shock, but captain Murasa's chuckles and slight laughter didn't seem to be helping. "So where's our morning tiger?" Murasa asked, looking around.

"She should still be asleep." Hijiri answered. "Unless one of you already woke her up. If not, I think I recall Nazrin having to wake her up today, so please go and fetch her." that honest and pure smile. She truly was the youkai jesus. I yawned a little. "Alright, alright. But if I don't make it alive out of her room anymore someone's gotta take care of my comrade." I slightly pointed at my friend in the basket. Hijiri gave me a smile filled with sympathy. No one liked to be the one to wake up master in the morning, not even Hijiri. I left the room and went to master's. I gave it a slight knock with my knuckles. "Master? Breakfast is ready!", I said in a normal tone of voice. As I was met by silence I opened the door a little. "Master?" She was in a deep sleep. I sighed and went quietly to the side of her bed. I thought about shaking her a little, but I knew that I would lose it as soon as I touched her. Seeing her sleep was already troubling my heart. I've surely been blushing already.

Those perfectly shaped lips, her eyelids covering her eyes, showing her beautiful eye lashes, it was indeed very hard for me not to fall all over her. "Master?" I whispered. I finally received an answer, but it was just a mumble. Master seemed to be half-awake, but mostly asleep. "Master, breakfast is ready." She mumbled some more before reaching out into the air and suddenly grabbing my shoulders. I now felt how my heart started beating faster than it should and how the blood rose to my cheeks. "M-Master?", I asked, my voice a little louder, as I hoped for her to let go. But instead of letting go she pulled me down half on top and half beside her.

Her sweet scent was all around me ans she was so warm. Even though there was no doubt that this had been an uncontrolled sleeping movement I enjoyed the result of it very much. I would surely get a heart attack soon, judging by the speed of my heart. I needed to get away from her, I shouldn't be held like that, it would only give me more hopes, hopes which would be torn apart later on. But maybe I could enjoy this just for another moment. I closed my eyes and let my mind free. Her scent and warmth offered me to dream about my master. But this wasn't the right moment. I opened my eyes again and started to try to struggle free from her arms, just before I noticed that two golden yellow eyes were staring at me. I met her gaze with shock.

"M-Master!" I yelled in surprise. I would have to explain this, but what should I say? 'You pulled me next to you?' No one would believe that. "Good morning Nazu-chan!" She greeted me friendly smiling at me like this was the most normal way to wake up. No questions? No morning annoyance? Was I probably dreaming once again? Before I could continue my thoughts, master gave me a tight hug and stood up. I saw in a mirror that my face was ruby red now. I've never blushed as hard as this, but I had a good reason, didn't I? Master then looked at me, still no sign of annoyance. She smiled. "I would like to get dressed now." She said, her smile not fading.

I understood and left the room, thinking about the weirdness that had just happened. I decided to just go and wait for her with the others and returned. "Did she wake- What happened to you?", Hijiri started friendly before seeing my face. Her gaze turned worried. I saw Ichirin looking confused at me from the corner of my eye, while Murasa had trouble fighting laughter. I looked at her. "How come you are in such a laughter mood today?", I asked, an unwanted tone of rudeness in my voice. "Dunno. Just happened to be in a good mood." she shrugged. "I see. Anyway, I'm fine and yes, master's coming." I took my place next to Ichirin and Unzan. "And for once, she doesn't seem to be _that _annoyed.", I added.

"Really? Well, that's good." Hijiri smiled while finishing the breakfast preparations. "Let's just wait." She sat down and looked at us. I nodded approving, unsure about what else to do. It didn't take long for master to arrive. "Good morning." She said friendly, taking her place.

The breakfast went as peaceful as always. Everyone exchanged a few words about plans for the day and Nue appeared, complaining about being forgotten. We actually didn't forget her, but it's rare that she joins us for breakfast. Thank god Hijiri made enough food.

"Oh, by the way." Murasa started when most of us were done with eating. "There will be a festival at the Hakurei Shrine because of New Year's Eve. It is said that the Hakurei miko got a lot of help and prepared a lot of stuff. I think we should go.", the captain suggested, pulling a wrinkled piece of paper out of the pocket of her pants, smoothing it out and placing it on the middle of the table. I glanced at it, but didn't really care. I've never been the kind of person to party all night long and I didn't intend to go to that festival. It would most likely just be an opportunity for master and Hijiri to spend some romantic time together anyway. I wasn't that close with Murasa or Ichirin, so I would be left alone.

Master read the flyer. "But that's tomorrow already. Do we all have the proper clothing?" It wasn't like master to be worried about her appearance. Her often falling because of her clumsiness caused her clothing to be a complete mess sometimes and she didn't care. But at such an event she wanted to be dressed properly. Hijiri seemed to think. "Well, it would be necessary that everyone here has a kimono. I think I still have one." She pointed out. "Me as well." Ichirin said. "It isn't anything fancy but it will do for a Hakurei festival. What about you, captain?" Murasa scratched the back of her head. "I spent a lot of my lifetime at the sea. No one wore those things on the ship. And even if I would have had one, I wouldn't have kept it during my time being cursed. So simply no." I didn't even want to be asked. I hated kimonos. They were difficult to wear, impractical and certainly not my style. But telling by master's concern about the proper clothing, I had to wear one if we found a fitting one.

"I must have one too. I remember buying one once and never wearing it.", master thought. Master in a kimono. That might just look too perfect on her. "what about you, Nazu-chan?" The way she spoke my name. It sounded like an angel. "I never was a fan of fancy clothing." That answer was simple and correct. "So only you and Murasa need new clothing.", Hijiri said. "Hello?", Nue said, pointing out that she was still there. Hijiri looked at her. "Yes, Nue, you don't have one either. But since you wouldn't _want _to wear one anyway and none of us can tell you what to do, it's not much of a matter for our planning." She smiled. Nue tried to argue with that, but failed. She didn't know what to say anymore and left with a slight "tss." "As I was saying. You two are the only ones who need kimonos."

"Well, you know, I _can _go without one, let's not get unnecessary things." I tried to talk myself out of it. "I don't know if those things would even suit me and besides, I'm not planning on going anyway." I continued. "Nonsense!" Master threw in. "You have to wear one too and I'm sure we find one that _does_ suit you. Also, you _have_ to come. It's New Year's Eve and we're all going." She saw my unhappy face. "Please?" Murasa raised her voice. "I don't need one. After all I'm a captain and I should look like one." Somehow, Murasa's excuse sounded more convincing than mine. "But it would be a nice change, Murasa!", Hijiri tried to convince our captain. "We could pick out a really pretty one for you." Murasa sighed. She didn't like arguing, most likely because it bored her. "Fine, if you insist." she said a little annoyed, making Byakuren cheer.

"Alright, I will be busy today, maybe you could go and drag those two clothes shopping?" Master asked Hijiri. "What? But I-" I tried to interrupt, but was interrupted myself. "Sure. Let's first go to that shop Korindou and if they don't have anything I heard there's a puppeteer that's very handy and also makes clothing if someone asks her to." With that the conversation was ended and Hijiri started to take the breakfast things away from the table. I couldn't even say anything anymore. Great. I was damned to wear a kimono. If at least master would go pick one out for me. At that thought something else came to my mind. Why did Hijiri have to accompany Murasa and me? It's not like we were children after all. Whatever. She'll have her reasons.

With the others leaving I left too, just to take a walk outside. As soon as I took in the fresh air I started to daydream about Master again. I really needed to find a solution for the problem of my crush. Actually I shouldn't even be around anymore. I was sent by Bishamonten to watch over Master, but it turned out that she is just fine by herself. So why was I still there? Still at master's side? I was useless now. But unless Master wanted me to leave I would stay. Feeling the feelings I felt, I couldn't stand the thought of leaving. But I needed a solution or at least help. As soon as possible.

Lost in my thoughts and concerns I didn't notice that I was leaving the area of the temple. I didn't have any goal or any particular direction to walk into, but just away in silence would be fine. Silence so I could think of something.

Bero bero ba! An umbrella youkai stretched her tongue out, apparently trying to scare me. Bad luck for her it didn't work. "Can I help you somehow?" I asked annoyed. I didn't like being pulled out of my thoughts, especially not important ones. The other youkai looked at me disappointed. "You're not scared?" "Not really." I answered. Her eyes suddenly started to water up. It surprised me. Normally I would just ignore it, but if I was the reason for her crying I had to help. "Don't cry! Sorry for not being scared! I'm sure everyone else is frightened as soon as they see you!" As that statement left my lips her crying became even worse. "No one's afraid of me! I'm a Karakasa! I should be able to scare everyone!" I didn't know what to do so I placed my hands on her shoulders. Hey it doesn't matter! I actually don't have a purpose anymore and I'm still there! As long as you have someone to be with!" I tried my best to cheer the poor girl up. But her crying became even worse. " I don't have anyone!" So many tears... "Y-yes you do! You do now! Me!" She looked confused at me.

"I'm Nazrin, I live at the Myouren temple! I will now be your friend!", I stated very loudly. "Her crying disappeared and she smiled at me, a few last sobs taking over her body. "I-I'm Kogasa... Tatara Kogasa..." I sighed in relief. The girl named Kogasa stopped crying. I wanted to turn and leave but "Where are you going?" The karakasa stopped me. "Nowhere in particular. Just taking a walk... you wanna come along, I suppose?" I said questioning. She nodded. "Well, let's go." I had to be nice, I promised her to be he friend after all. On our way to nowhere she asked some things about me and I answered her everything. I didn't even try to ask more about her, because in the end she would just start crying again and I didn't want that.

After some walking I stopped hearing her as my mind covered her voice up with my own. I was thinking about my problem once again, hoping to find a solution or a way to make things less painful for me. "Nazrin?" Her voice then ripped me out of my new thoughts. "huh?" "Geez, are you even listening? I called you name about five times already!" I looked away from her. 2Sorry I was just... thinking." I didn't see her face, but I was sure she was confused by my sudden depressed voice. "What's wrong?" She asked kindly. "Nothing, I just... have a lot of troubles right now." I explained. "Nothing you'd understand." "You don't know that." She said childish. "I could try to understand if you just told me... Please, I'm sure I can help. Sometimes it even helps just to get some trouble talked out." She placed a hand on my shoulder, causing me to turn around. Her smile was convincing and honest.

She was really interested in helping me, not like the other people I usually hung out with. I was on the edge of crying, but fought the tears back inside. "Alright..." We sat on some rocks which were just standing randomly on the meadow we walked to. I felt how the urge to tell her all my troubles grew bigger and then it just started to flow out of me. "Well, there's this master of mine. I really, really like her as in really much. But she likes that person, Hijiri. She's a great person alright and she made master what she is today, but I really wish that master wouldn't like her." I looked sadly at my feet. "Also, I shouldn't even be at her side anymore, I was sent by Bishamonten to watch her, but she proved herself as good disciple which is why I have no use for her anymore. She's my master. There's no way she could ever feel the way I feel for her towards me." I explained sadly. I glanced at Kogasa.

The karakasa seemed touched by my story. "Awww, poor you..." Having someone feel sympathy for me felt really good and Kogasa had been right. Just talking about this made me already feel better. "Well, I'm not an expert, but would you like to hear my advice?" I looked at her and gave her a nod. She might not seem like an expert in love situations but I would gladly listen to her advice. "Well, maybe you should tell that Hijiri about it. You said she's a nice person, right? So she will understand and you can find a solution together and maybe that solution includes you confessing to your master. You seem really desperate to get her so I'm sure Hijiri will understand it." I was surprised. That was actually a rather good idea. "Why didn't I think of that? It's so obvious!" I cursed. "You are in love, Nazrin. And you would never go for advice to the person you're jealous of, it's in the nature of creatures to avoid people we have negative feelings towards. But as you said this might be an exception, if you give yourself a little push, I'm sure she and you can work together."

I was taken by surprise once again. "How come you know stuff like that?" I asked, pointing out that Kogasa sounded really smart as she explained the past thing to me. "When you have no home, you get around a lot and hear lots of things, I guess I just found a piece of knowledge here and another there." She explained smiling, proudly of me calling her smart. "Well, thank you..." I said. "I probably should get back to the temple. Hijiri wants to drag me and the captain along to go shopping for kimonos." I made a fake gagging noise. "Kimonos? Are you going to that Hakurei festival?", the youkai next to me asked. "'coz I will go there too." She got excited. I smiled a little bit. At least I won't be alone as I thought I'd be then. "Really? That's great." My voice didn't sound as excited as it could have. "Well, I really should go now. See you at the festival." I got off the rock and started to walk away. Looking back I saw Kogasa waving me excitedly, happy about me being her new friend. I waved back a little.

This karakasa... she had made me so happy just now.

I guess once in a while you need someone to listen and feel sympathy.

Once in a while you need a true friend.

So this is Chapter 2! Is anyone even reading this? Meh, whatever.

I'd appreciate reviews^^


	3. Chapter 3: The secret of a mouse

**The mouse, the tiger and the youkai jesus**

_Chapter 3: The secret of a mouse_

As soon as I returned home I found Ichirin and Byakuren holding kimonos in the air, checking them. Even though I hated to admit it, Hijiri would probably look great in it. "This should do..." I heard Ichirin mumble as she put hers away, followed by the youkai jesus. "I'm sure it'll look great on you." she smiled at her follower. Then she looked at me and Murasa, who happened to be standing right next to me. "Alright, let's go find you two something to wear." She smiled. I remembered my thoughts earlier and wondered. "But Hijiri-sama, neither Murasa nor me are little children anymore, we can just go and buy those ourselves."

"You _can_. But if I'm corrected, neither of you've ever bought one, right? So it's best to have someone with you who knows what you have to focus on while buying one." That made sense. "Where's master?" I then questioned out of the blue, noticing that my beloved master wasn't around. "I'm not sure. I think she said she was going to look for her kimono, so she might be in her room, but we should go now, anyways." I heard the captain next to me make a grunting kind of noise, apparently she didn't like it any more than I did. But at least I had one bright side. It might make master happy. She was the one who insisted, after all.

Soon the three of us left the temple and went to the small shop, Korindou. I had been there before once. The shopkeeper, who had found the jeweled pagoda after master lost it once, sold it to me for a high price so I could bring it back. There were all sorts of things everywhere in the shop, everything was stuffed with things from the outside world or just weird things, which seemed to be past their time of use. I couldn't stop my curiosity as I looked at the strange objects. Hijiri gave them far not as much attention as I did and focused on the shopkeeper, while Murasa wasn't interested in anything. Guess, she'd be happy as soon as she was back at the temple.

"Hello, are you the shopkeeper here?" Hijiri asked politely. The man, and probably one and only man besides Unzan in Gensokyou, looked at the savior, who smiled friendly. "Why, yes I am. Morichika Rinnosuke. How can I help you? Are you looking for anything special? Maybe something from the outside world?" He was about to present us one of the weird things, but Hijiri stopped him. "No, actually, we just need kimonos. Do you have those here?" He thought for a short while before raising his voice. "Well, I _do _have some traditional clothing, I'm not sure about kimonos. Please wait here." He left. I looked around, wondering where we would try those things on. But then I remembered that it would probably fit if the length was okay. You could just bind it more tightly or less tightly after all.

After a few minutes the shopkeeper came back. "I'm sorry, but it appears I don't have any kimonos. I do have a yukata if you're interested..." He started, trying to talk us into buying something else. "No, no, a yukata would be way too cool for this time of the year, thank you for your trouble, though." And with a sweet smile she left, Murasa and me following her like two puppies following their owner. "Any ideas on where to go now?" Murasa asked, obviously still not really interested. "Yes. As I said before. There's that really handy puppeteer. She makes dolls and can do other things. I think we could ask her if she does clothing. We could pay her well." We could? I never knew about the Myouren temple budget for things like that.

The mentioned puppeteer lived at the forest of magic, which was sort of a long way to go. I didn't mind walking much, I was already used to it because of the dowsing. But the captain complained with every step she took. She wasn't that lazy, but I guess she just wasn't used to that much walking, especially not for something like kimonos. There was no sign of anyone being home when we arrived, but Hijiri knocked anyways. The door opened, much to my surprise. "Uh, hello?" A blonde girl asked, obviously unsure about who we were. "Can I help you somehow?" "Yes, hello. I'm Hijiri Byakuren from the Myouren temple and these are Captain Murasa and Nazrin. We came to ask you a request." That voice. How could she keep that polite and friendly tone at all times? "A request? What kind of request?" "Well, we happened to hear that you are very handy. Would you be able to make a kimono within a short amount of time." The girl thought for a while. "I think I could do that, yes. Do you need one? For the Hakurei festival maybe?" Hijiri nodded towards her. "Well, for who of you should it be?" "Both of them need one." "Two? Sorry, but I couldn't possibly make two until the festival, one will already be troubling enough." she explained.

"Not even if we pay well?", Hijiri asked. "It's not about money, it's about the time, it would just be impossible for a normal puppeteer to do it with less than two days. You can only get one, sorry.", she apologized. Hijiri thought about that. "Well, alright, then only make one for Nazrin-chan. Maybe I happen to have another one or we'll think of something.", Byakuren explained, much to Murasa's delight. The captain showed how happy she was about maybe not having to wear a kimono. "w-wait? Why me? Wouldn't it look better on the captain, anyway?" I complained, trying once again to get myself out of it. "Even if she would, I promised your master I'd get you a kimono and I am not planning on breaking any promises." I sighed once again true. I just hoped master would like me in a kimono.

Alice looked at me. "Yes, I think I will get one done within the small amount of time we have." I felt like she was referring to my size, I wasn't that tall. Being a mouse youkai I happened to not have a future of growing tall. "Come in, I'll take measurements on you, so it will be perfect." The puppeteer held the door open, expecting me to enter. Finally accepting, yet still not liking my fate I entered her house and the door closed. I could see through the window that Hijiri and Murasa were talking more than when I was around. Was I that much of a mood killer? I looked around. The girl's house was prettily decorated. Not my taste of room decoration, but whatever. There were dolls everywhere, the couch, the cupboards, everything full of those handmade dolls. "Alright, you need to take your dress of so I can take the right measurements." The puppeteer's voice suddenly crossed the silence. Oh right, how could I forget that, I had to lose my clothing for this.

I sighed and did as I was told, saying "This is all for master, this is all for master..." over and over in my mind again. "Hold out your arms, please." I did so. She took all the necessary lengths and wrote them down, body length, arm length, only the leg length, waist girth, hip girth, chest girth... every single detail about me that I didn't need to know. As I mentioned before, I don't have a perfect body, especially not compared to someone like Hijiri and all those notes just proved it. "Okay, this should be everything. What colors would you like it to be?" Colors? How would I know? I always wore the same brownish gray dress, but I was sure master would prefer it if I wore something I usually didn't wear. "Well, what colors would be good for me?" I asked. If I remembered correctly, I think I heard that she was called the seven-colored-puppeteer, so she had to know something about colors. But I guessed a lot of people would know more about that stuff than me, I wasn't interested in fashion after all.

She took a better look at my face, then at my hair. I didn't really know why, but if it helped I didn't care. It was for master, after all. "Hm... Green is out of question, it would be a contrast to your eyes and blue just doesn't match. Yellow might still be okay, but it always makes people look pale, especially with gray hair it wouldn't look as good. I suppose we should just take red, a dark red color that matches your eyes. Maybe with a greyish pattern and a gray obi?" I just nodded. It sounded good. "Alright, then, I will have Shameimaru drop it by tomorrow." She told me and wrote some more notes down. "The myouren temple, correct?" "Yes." "Okay, then. See you at the festival." "Yes."

With that I put my gray capelet over my shoulders, I got into my dress before already. I places the basket of my comrade, whom I had places on the ground before, back over my tail and let my friend hop in. I made a short bye-movement before leaving the puppeteer's house. As soon as I was outside I noticed that Hijiri and Murasa stopped their apparently interesting talk. It doesn't feel great to be the killer of fun, I tell ya. We walked home in silence. No one said a word, but as I looked into the other one's faces, I could tell that they had talked about something important, something that had something to do with me. Hijiri wasn't smiling anymore, her face was thoughtful, yet not in a negative way, while the captain was thinking less hard. I forgot about their talk or at least tried to and tried to imagine myself in the kimono. Did we actually pay? Well, I guess we'd have to do it later. Since I originally didn't even want a kimono, Hijiri would pay it. She took care of the budget of the temple after all.

As we arrived the temple I saw Murasa immediately leaving to do whatever. Maybe captain's stuff. Hijiri was about to leave too, but I felt like it was time to use Kogasa's advice. "Um, Hijiri-sama!" She turned around and looked at me. "Before you leave... there's something I need to talk to you about..." "Sure, Nazrin, what is it?" I looked around. "Maybe we can talk... in private?" She made an understanding expression. "Of course." We left the temple once again and I led her to the rocks, Kogasa and I had been sitting on. It was quiet there. "What a beautiful place..." I heard her whisper, before she sat down. Then she turned her gaze towards me. "So, what is it? Do you have any troubles?" I looked to the ground sadly. "Kind of... I... I have to tell you something, but you might not like it... please promise me, whatever it is, you will hear me out and keep it to yourself, alright? She gave me a friendly and curious nod. "well... since a while now, I started to feel something... I... I..." I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, the blush came to my cheeks. "I like Shou-sama!" I said a little too loud then I looked around quickly and carefully, but no one besides us was there.

I then looked at Hijiri who seemed surprised. "You... like her as in you more than like her?" She asked. I closed my eyes in shame and lowered my head, then I nodded. "I knew I saw you sending her some special gazes!" she said triumphal. Huh? She wasn't mad? I looked at her confused. "You don't hate me for it?" I wondered. "Of course not, why would I? I think it's sweet. You having a huge crush on your master." She giggled a little. She thought is was sweet? But didn't she want master for herself? "But... don't you like her as well? You talk so often and-" I was cut off at that point. "We're just getting along very well, Nazrin. You don't need to worry. I'm not interested in dating your master. … So that's why you gave me glances, which would kill me if they could. You really thought that there was a danger of her and me getting together...?" she asked.

I nodded. "You two talked so often... and I was the one who always killed the mood. I was so jealous of how she likes you more than me, Hijiri-sama... Whoever compares me with you, would take you." I felt so miserable. I had always thought about that, but saying it... I couldn't hold back my tears any longer and started to cry terribly right there in front of Hijiri. Embarrassing. I pulled my knees to my chest, wrapped my arms around them and buried my face. I should be happy that Hijiri didn't like master, but there was no doubt it was different the other way around. Thinking that and so much more, more and more tears left my eyes along with sobs and the loud whimpering. I surely was pathetic. A pathetic being without a real purpose. Instead of telling me to stop or complaining about my crying, Hijiri placed her hands on my shoulders and knelt in front of me so she was my height. I looked up and found myself looking into her eyes. "There, there..." She whispered gently as she embraced my still crying form gently, rubbing my back, giving me comfort.

And for once I loved how she truly was the good-hearted youkai jesus.

Even if she helped me so much, I couldn't stop the sobs taking over my body or the tears escaping my eyes. I was ashamed of myself. Hijiri then stopped hugging me and went back to placing her hands on my shoulders. "Nazrin, don't make yourself feel this horrible. You're a great person. You might not be like me, but why would you want to be like me, when you can be yourself? You're thinking a complete different thing than the truth right now. Believe me. Your master doesn't dislike you, even if you might think that. She has her reason for acting the way she did. Please understand."

I wiped my last tears away with my sleeve, looked at Hijiri and nodded slightly. "I understand... I still wish she would know how I feel... But even if she did there's no way that she could ever feel the same for me." I sighed. My body had calmed down and I just made some final sobs, while my eyes stopped producing salty tears. The youkai jesus smiled at me and her eyes showed sympathy. "Would you like me to help you a little?" She asked. That surprised me. She really wanted to help me? "...you want to help me...? ... Why?" I asked her. "Because I don't like seeing anyone in misery and because no one deserves to have to suffer like that. Even if it might not work out with you two, even though I think the chances are good, maybe you two could at least find a solution. I already started helping you." She smiled at me, apparently having a secret of her own.

I looked at her confused. "You did...? How...?" Her smile didn't fade. "Don't worry. Well, when we were at the house of that puppeteer and she said that we could only get one kimono I told you to get it, didn't I? I could have told your master that we just couldn't get one and I usually would have said that we don't take any to be fair to both you and Murasa. But because I already thought that you had some special feelings for your master, I wanted you to wear one for sure, so your master will take a closer look at you, that's also what I was talking about to Murasa, and maybe you could use that as an opportunity to be alone with her and confess." She winked at me, but the last part of her statement shocked me. "C-Confess? You mean... no, I couldn't! Not this soon! Not like this, I don't even know how to do something like that!"

Hijiri giggled a little. "Nazrin, do you know that you're cute when you're flustered?" She asked me smiling. "Ehhhhh?" Was the only thing I got out of my mouth. Cute? "And I'm not the only one who thinks that way for sure." She winked at me again, I understood what she meant and looked away blushing, unsure about what to say. "As I was saying, you should confess to her. Or do you want to feel the way you did until now for the rest of oyur life?" "Of course not!" I said quickly. Me confessing... to my beautiful master... thousand scenarios run through my mind, showing me what might happen, one more terrifying than another. "But what if she says no... what if she says she dislikes me? Or even hates me?" I asked quietly. This was absolutely not like me. "I see... you're afraid of being rejected. But even if you will be, then you can finally know for sure what to think or do. And it's not like your master would be cruel to you. In case she doesn't want you the way you want her, she'll tell you friendly, she knows that this would be a very delicate matter and would treat it as such." All that was true. Master would never be mean to anyone unless she had a good reason to be.

"Alright, I'll... try my best..." I said, receiving a meaningful nod from Hijiri. Both of us returned to the temple, but before we entered I stopped her once again. "Um... Hijiri-sama? Please don't tell anyone I cried... it would really ruin my reputation as commander..." I asked her. "You cried?" She asked. I was confused before I saw her winking at me. I smiled a little bit. And while she entered the temple I stayed outside and looked into the air. She didn't have any special feelings for master... instead she'd even try helping me. I felt so much better and then I remembered a certain Karakasa who had helped me a lot. This certainly was a first star of luck in my dark sky of misery.

Hijiri Byakuren, the youkai savior... she gave me comfort.

**Alright, next chapter. I know I'm kinda late with the New Year's Eve stuff, but I'll try writing the next one quickly. Reviews make me happy. **


	4. Chapter 4: The kimono

**The mouse, the tiger and the youkai jesus**

_Chapter 4: The kimono_

There wasn't anything interesting at the same day, but I managed to stay away from master. Why I tried that? Simple. After talking to Hijiri and having a break out of crying like that I couldn't face her. I would probably not be able to keep everything that happened that day a secret anyway. I told everyone that I didn't want to eat because I felt a little sick and they believed it. Because it was hard for me to lie especially to master I told Hijiri to tell them. And she really did it, she lied for me. I've already found out that Hijiri didn't hate me and that she even wanted to help me, but like this, maybe she was even nicer than I thought she was. I just had to get to know her better.

Anyway, that day nothing more happened, only that I fell asleep starving. The morning afterwards I woke up and the first thing on my mind was: FOOD. I immediatly left my room, not caring that I was still wearing my pajamas. I ran into the kitchen, pushing Ichirin out of my way. "Hey!" was all that I heard from her. She probably complained more, but I didn't hear it, because I went into the kitchen quickly. I found Hijiri being the one to cook breakfast again, as soon as she saw me, she seemed surprised, because normally I'd never run around in my pajamas. But at that moment I couldn't care less about that. "Hijiri-sama, I don't want to be rude and I know that breakfast will be ready soon, but... food!" I begged. She smiled at me, chuckling warmly.

Right after that a bowl with miso soup and one with rice were placed in front of me. "Itadakimasu." I said right before starting to eat. Not just did I finally get my stomach stuffed with delicious food, but I also wouldn't have to face master. So still no danger of revealing my secret unwanted. I then noticed Hijiri watching me eat. "mfmngh?" I kept my mouth closed while trying to ask her why she was looking at me. Of course she didn't understand me. So I swallowed the food and started over again. "Why are you looking at me? Do I have something on my face?" She shook her head. "No, but it's nice to see you not hating me anymore and it's unusual seeing you in pajamas." She said while preparing more food. She might be perfect and if you dislike her you might hate it, but if you get along with her you can really enjoy it. At that point I knew why master liked to be Hijiri's follower. "Don't get used to it, you won't have to look at it any longer than until I finish this food. It's good by the way." I changed my attitude towards Hijiri a lot, but it was a good thing, I wanted to exaggerate a little to make up for sending her death glares.

"Oh, thank you. Maybe I could teach you how to cook at some point, so you might be a good wife to someone." She winked at me, making me blush. "Uhm... I should probably go and get dressed in my usual clothing. ... When will we actually go to the Hakurei festival?"" I asked, changing the topic. Hijiri thought for a moment. "Well, I guess we'll go sometime at afternoon. We don't need to be there that early." I nodded and left to my room. Right after I got dressed someone bursted through the front door. I went to take a look at the intruder. It was a crow tengu with short black hair. The famous Shameimaru Aya. She carried a package under her arm. "Hello? Anyone home?" She looked around and then she noticed me. "Oh, hello, am I correct at the Myouren temple? And are you Nazrin?" I went closer to her. "Yes, that's correct and I suppose you brought my package from the puppeteer?" I asked her and took a closer look at the package. "That's right. And she said that I should tell you to give her the money at the Hakurei festival. Have fun with the kimono." She said, giving me the package. "You know what's inside?" Wasn't that kind of a secret? Even for tengu? "I took a peek at the notes about you." She grinned. "You did?" "Yes, I have to say I didn't expect that size of your chest, seriously." "What's this noise all about." A familiar and tired voice behind me asked.

I turned around and found Master. In her pajamas. Heaven. I think I had a nosebleed. "m-master! Good morning to you!" She made an annoyed grunt. It was the morning annoyance. She looked at Shameimaru. "So, anyways, what's this all about?" "Oh, we were just discussing your underling's chest size, which is by the way-" "Jeweled Pagoda: GREATEST TREASURE!" I lifted my strongest spellcard into the air and blasted the surprised tengu out. I was able to make it only when the pagoda was around. Luckily master had brought it with her. I made a little "Phew" before more less reattaching the door. I turned towards master. "I'm sorry for the disturbance, master." I apologized. She walked towards me and I expected a spellcard or a slap or something for the rough wake up call and closed my eyes. Instead of pain I felt a soft wipe under my nose. I opened my eyes and found master wiping the part under my nose with a soft tissue. "huh...?" I wondered. "You had a little blood there, Nazu-chan, are you alright?" I looked at her in her pajamas. She looked so cute... "Yes, I'm fine." I smiled. "Heyo, good morning!" Captain Murasa said. Damn, did she have to burst in right now? I left to my room, giving master a last smile and Murasa a glare.

I immediatly unpacked the kimono and my basket comrade climbed excited out of the basket and looked curiously at my unpacking. "Let's just hope it looks good, huh?" I looked at my friend, who nodded back towards me. After I had removed all of the wrapping, I took a close look at it. It was beautiful, I had to admit that that puppeteer did a good job on it. I unfolded it and looked at it again. Then I held it in front of me. The length seemed to be okay and as I looked into a mirror I noticed that the choice of red really matched my eyes. The girl had made a flower like pattern in gray onto it. Even though I still wasn't a fan of this kind of clothing, this might even look acceptable on me. I looked at the time and thought about putting it on already, but it would be way too soon, I had to wait. I still couldn't believe that I would actually like wearing that thing. It wasn't like me at all.

So I waited and waited. Nothing happened, at least nothing special or interesting, so all I could do was wait some more. After half an hour, which seemed like a year I left the temple and went to dowse. I needed to distract myself so the time would pass more quickly. As I held out my dowsing rods, walking and waiting for a signal, I thought about how to confess to master. It surely wouldn't be easy. In fact, it would be the hardest thing I'd ever have to do. But Hijiri was right, I had to get this out now, the sooner the better... I thought and thought and I walked and walked, even though there was no treasure alarm from my dowsing, I had the most precious treasure in my thoughts. Thinking about her was good use of time in my opinion. Dreaming was always okay, right? Before I knew it some hours have past. I checked the time. "By Bishamonten! I need to get back to the temple!" I said to myself and hurried back. I bursted through the broken front door and entered. I hurried to my room and tried to bind my kimono, but I failed. "Damn, this is kind of hard..." I cursed. I heard a knock at my door "Nazrin, are you ready?" "Not yet... I don't think I can make it on my own..." I admitted. I heard quiet talking outside, I didn't know that there were more people than Hijiri. "Can I come in?" The youkai jesus' voice broke my train of thought. "Yes." I answered. Hijiri came in and looked at me as I was helpless trying to get dressed. She smiled and giggled. "Let me help you." She came to me and started to help me get dressed. "The others already went to the festival. The kimono looks great by the way." She finished binding it. I looked into the mirror, surprised of the way I looked.

"This is... acceptable." I said more to myself than to Hijiri. "Acceptable? You look great! And I know who will think the same way, hehe..." she made a weird face and I started to blush. "Um... you look great yourself." "Thanks." she smiled. I looked at my comrade and took the mouse, putting the basket once again over my tail. "You'll take it with you?" Hijiri asked me. "Of course, I could never abadon my fellow!" Hijiri shrugged and we left. The closer we got to the festival, the more nervous I got. The festival meant master and master meant confession. I blushed at the very thought of that. Hijiri seemed to understand it and let me be in my thought. "It'll be alright." She said to me.

When we arrived I saw the others waiting for us already.

And there she was. Shou. In her kimono. She was gorgeous.

* * *

I know this one's kind of short, I'll try to make the next one longer.


	5. Chapter 5: The mouse and the tiger

**The mouse, the tiger and the youkai jesus**

_Chapter 5: The mouse and the tiger_

I couldn't stop staring at master. She was just too beautiful in that kimono for me to look away. It was colored in yellow orange in black and had a tiger fur pattern on it. Her hair was the same as always, because it was too short for a ponytail or even pigtails. She just wore a black hairband to make it at least look a little different. The others didn't look bad. Ichirin's kimono was blue and white and had the same pattern as her clothing. She wore her hair in a ponytail and didn't wear that strange thing over her head. The captain wore some mix of her normal attire with some extras. With a lot of imagination the whole thing could pass for traditional clothing. Nue was also there. It turned out that Hijiri had been right, Nue wasn't wearing anything unusual or traditional or maybe we just believed that? Who knew, this was Nue after all. By the way, Hijiri wore her hair in aponytail or some sort of it. Her kimono was black-white and simple, yet pretty.

At thinking about that I realized that I might turn more girly. Hopefully not. I looked at master again, who was now smiling at me. "That looks good on you, Nazu-chan!" She said happily. I made her happy with this. I did it. "Th-thank you! You look great, master." I blushed a little. Hijiri leaned towards me and whispered. "Told ya, she'd like it." I just blushed a little more from that. I saw a familiar karakasa far behind master, waving at me excitedly." I smiled a little. "Um, excuse me for a minute, will you?" I said and left to Kogasa, whom was happy to see me and immediately pulled me into a hug, I was only able to bring out an"umpf!" "Geez, Kogasa, you missed me?" I asked and hugged her back a little. She then pulled away from the hug. "Well, yes, it was lonely! I hoped to run into again, but it didn't happen. I like your kimono by the way. It looks good." she smiled friendly. I smiled back at her, at the first one who I could see as a true friend. "Thank you, I like yours, too." "Thanks!" She squeaked happily.

Kogasa wore a light blue kimono with dark blue obi. It had a red-blue-purple umbrella pattern, karakasas to be precise. I glanced at my fellows, who were watching me and my friend. Guess I was wrong about them, they wouldn't just go without me. "Kogasa, I want to introduce you to someone. I smiled a little and took her wrist, pulling her to the others, she followed my quick step hastily, almost dropping her umbrella. I could see that she was nervous about meeting new people. "Hey, I want you to meet someone. This is Tatara Kogasa, she's a karakasa. I ran into her trying to scare me." I smiled as I showed them my new friend. Kogasa also smiled, yet she was obviously nervous. "Well, good to meet you." Hijiri said and smiled. "These are Kumoi Ichirin, Captain Murasa Minamitsu, Houjuu Nue, Toramaru Shou and I'm Hijiri Byakuren. We are the followers of Bishamonten and live at the Myouren temple." "I-It's a pleasure to meet you!" Kogasa stuttered. "Is she your girlfriend?" Ichirin asked.

I felt how my cheeks reddened a little and from the corner of my eye I could see my master's empty eyes. That empty gaze. "No,no." I said quickly. "We're just friends, alright? Nothing more. Just friends!" "Oh, okay." Ichirin said. Kogasa looked at my master. "You're Nazrin's master, right?" How the hell did she know? I never told her! Master nodded, the life had come back to her eyes. "Yes, that's correct. Did Nazrin tell you that?" master wondered. Kogasa shook her head lightly. "No, but I can tell by something." She chuckled. If she revealed my secret like that I'd end this friendship just as it started. "You can? Oh are you some kind of mind-reader?" Master wondered. "No, I have my ways." Kogasa had warmed up and wasn't nervous anymore.

Byakuren then raised her voice. "While you two get to know each other better, we need to discuss something." she pulled Ichirin, Murasa and me with her. Nue had left just after meeting the karakasa for some reason. "What's this all about?" Ichirin asked. "Well, we have to help Nazrin." Hijiri said. "With what?" Ichirin asked again. "Alright, here it goes: Nazrin likes her master... a lot. And today is the day she finally wants to tell her master." I couldn't believe how easy it was for Hijiri to say all that. "that's sweet and all, but how should we help her with that?" The captain questioned. "First of all, you have to make sure that she doesn't drink alcohol. If just one drop of sake enters that mouth she won't be serious enough about Nazrin telling her. "Make sure she doesn't drink, got it." Murasa said. I was surprised at hearing that. "Alright then, if there's anything new I will tell you." With that Hijiri left to master. They talked and I could hear one or another word like anpan (Beanbread) or melonpan (Melonbread). Were they talking about food? Ichirin left as well, I didn't have to expect anything from her, since she wasn't that close to master and also didn't have to courage to just butt in and interrupt. Only Murasa and I were left in the discussion.

I looked at her. "You're helping me...? Why...?" I asked her confused. "Hm? Come on, Nazrin, even though I laugh at you when you do something embarrassing or joke around with you a lot it's not like I don't like you. We're all part of the same crew, right? And a crew needs to stick together 'til the end and help each other. You'd do the same for me, I know it, don't you try to deny it! After all we're … a family." Murasa had a smile on her face and was obviously forcing some tears back in. Such touching words... from her. I smiled at her as I felt a tear form in my eye. That's right, I had a family. The best possible. "Now, if you tell anyone I said that cheesy stuff I will make sure you get an anchor up your lower behind." She made a weird grin towards me that was kind of terrifying. "U-Understood!" I calmed her down.

We went back to the others and it turned out that they were having an exciting conversation about food. Right now Kogasa was talking. "Well, I personally like melonpan without filling better, it's also easier to make and-" Murasa cleaned her throat to interrupt and point out that we were there. "Kogasa, you know how to make melonpan?"" I threw in. "Oh yes." She smiled. "I know how to make all sorts of food, I don't like tooting my own horn, but I can actually good really well." What was this sudden burning feeling inside of me, oh right. I was the outcast. "Oh, that's good to know." I smiled a little helpeless. "Do you know how to cook?" She smiled brightly at me as everyone else busted into fake coughing. "Well..." I started. "...nevermind. Can we go to the festival now? We're just standing in front of the shrine stairs all the time while the others walk up." I pointed out. "Oh, right." Ichirin said and looked at the long stairs. She sighed and started walking up, counting the stairs to entertain herself. One...two... three... four... When she arrived at the top we were already waiting for her. "What? How did you guys get all the way up here this quickly?" she seemed shocked.

"...All of us can fly." Ichirin have herself a harsh facepalm. "Well, let's go." We walked closer to the shrine and watched the others. Everyone was there. All people from the top of the youkai mountain to the depth of Chireiden. Even that Enma and her subordinate had come to celebrate. Luckily we weren't the only ones in kimonos, most of the guests wore something traditional, even though, half of them had their clothing only half lose on their body, because of the dancing and making out the sake cursed them to do. The Hakurei Shrine maiden then came out of her shrine and greeted us. "Hello, glad to see that more arrived." She said sweetly. Yup. She was drunk as well. Then she made her way to her friend Kirisame Marisa and fell on top of her, only to get death glared by the not yet drunk puppeteer. Ah, yes, the puppeteer. I looked at Hijiri, who had watched the whole scene just as closely as I did. "I'll go pay her, you find yourselves some place to sit and then she was off.

I watched her talk to the blonde girl, who looked at me shortly, giving my look an approving nod, as sign that I looked good. Then I noticed that I was left standing there and the others had already sat close to the Moriya Shrine trio. I made my way through other drunk and laughing girls and sat next to Kogasa and that Moriya priestess, Kochiya Sanae. Kogasa was between my master and me, but I didn't even really realize that, I saw it and forgot it. But then she stood up. "Can I sit next to Sanae-san? I know her already." she scratched the back of her head and smiled. "Of course! Sorry!" I scooted next to my master. I could take her scent in. I looked at the Moriya group. Yasaka Kanako, the snake goddess had just a little bit too much sake, while Moriya Suwako seemed to be perfectly normal. But probably not for long. "Want some?" Kanako then offered all of us some sake. I shook my head. "not for me, I don't drink." I said making a gesture. Ichirin and Kogasa also said no politely. "Hm, why not, it's a party!" "That's the spirit!" The goddess agreed. Murasa accepted the offer, master seemed unsure.

"Well, just a little bit couldn't hurt, right?" She said to herself. I panicked. If I wanted to go through with Hijiri's plan seriously, master had to be sober. "You want to drink already?" Hijiri questioned from behind, causing master to turn around. "Well, just a little bit, why do you ask?" "Come on, you know you're not good with alcohol, at least wait 'til night to get hammered. I thought you wanted to enjoy part of the festival while knowing what's going on, hm?" Master looked at the sake. "I refuse, thank you." My mouth almost fell open, Hijiri's power to convince people. Amazing. Master looked at our captain who already got a refill of sake. "Murasa seems to enjoy it." "Well, she never said she wanted to be sober enough to enjoy some of the festival." Hijiri explained. Ichirin watched Murasa drink. "Maybe you shouldn't drink too much, I'm not intending in having to carry you back home." She sighed annoyed. "Who said you'd do it?" Murasa started to laugh loudly. Yeah, the alcohol was already circling in her system.

I looked around. The night was starting to consume the day as everything turned darker. The not so sober Hakurei Miko turned on some lanterns which offered warmth and light. The first stars were visible. I then turned my gaze towards master and forgot everything around me. Seeing her face in the light of the lanterns... it was such a beautiful sight. And the way she was drooling... wait, drooling? I broke my own train of thoughts with that. Yes, she was drooling. Her reason was all the food, she had noticed just now. She politely asked if it was fine to just take some of it and the Moriya Miko said it was fine. So she started to eat some of this and some of that. I chuckled really quietly. It was better than drinking.

The evening passed and soon the full night settled in, more stars became visible and there was a full moon. It was just perfect. As soon as the full moon appeared a growl did as well, I looked around for the source and so did everyone else, who wasn't too drunk yet. The schoolteacher had turned into her Hakutaku form, but she seemed to have perfect control over it, so it didn't matter. I then felt someone pull me away from the happy chit-chat party I quickly looked behind me and found out that it was Hijiri. "Alright, we kept her from drinking at any opportunity she had so far. Soon only the ones who fell asleep from drinking will be here, you need to do it now!" she whispered.

"W-wha-? Now? But..." "No buts! Go to her and tell her you need to talk to her in private. You can do it, Nazrin, remember what I told you. Come on, don't you think she deserves to know that you feel about her as soon as possible?" I looked at her, her smiling face. How she laughed at Murasa and Kanako who were drunk enough to dance and sing together. "You're right... " I walked up to my master and cleaned my throat. She and also the others looked at me. "Uhm... master...? Can I talk to you in private for a moment, please...?" She looked confused at me. "Uh, sure." She stood up and we want together behind the Hakurei Shrine. You could barely heard the festival from there and we were alone. "Let's sit down... alright?" I asked her. She nodded and we sat down together. I recall sitting with her like this, but not alone and certainly not in such a romantic atmosphere.

"So what is it that you wanted?" she asked me. I looked into her eyes, how they shone in the moonlight, they were so beautiful. I blushed hardly as I raised my voice. "I-I need to tell you something... it's very important to me, so please listen well... I-I like you... I like you more than I should like you..." I glanced up to see her shocked face I decided to just go on, lowering my gaze. "I've liked you for some time now... but I never thought there was any possibility of you feeling the same for me, so I kept it a secret." I felt a tear run down my cheek. "You like Hijiri, right...? I've been noticing that you talk to her very much and... you looked at me like you hate me sometimes... I've been so incredibly jealous..." I started to cry worse. "I was sent by Bishamoten to watch that you are a good disciple. But... you are. And now I have no meaning in being here anymore. I should actually leave... I don't deserve to be called a commander anymore. I'm just a little pile of misery... But you deserve to know the truth..." I looked deeply into her eyes. "And so I tell you... I love you, Toramaru Shou." My face was covered in tears, my cheeks were ruby red and my gaze was probably broken and hurt. How could she not laugh at that sight? But she didn't. Instead she gave me a blank stare.

A blank stare. I felt how my heart started to break. I backed away from her a tiny bit and lowered my gaze, tears flooding my eyes and cheeks as my quiet sobs were audible. She didn't love me, I had hoped for this not to happen... but it was the truth. I should leave... it was for the best. I then suddenly felt a finger under my chin, stroking my skin. I felt my head being lifted up gently, my gaze being turned to look directly into master's eyes. I saw happiness within them. Her lips were twisted to a smile. With the hand she wasn't holding my face with, she wiped away my tears. "Now, now... you look cute when you blush, you know that?" She whispered into my ear. "W-Wha-?" I said but she gently placed a finger on my lips. "Shhhhhhh..." She shushed me. "Don't talk." She whispered. And then...

...her lips were like velvet. I saw that her eyes were closed while she was blushing, so I closed mine as well. I wasn't sure about what to do so I wrapped my arms carefully around her. The taste of her mouth was so special. Sweeter than honey, yet hotter than chili. I wanted this moment to last forever. It was way better than in my dreams.

After what seemed like hours we parted our lips. I slowly opened my eyes and saw master doing the same. I couldn't believe it. She kissed me. She really kissed me. I stared at her speechless. I heard a small noise behind me and saw Hijiri and the others watching us but then quickly hiding from the corner of my eye. I looked back at master, who had obviously seen the same as me, but she just shrugged smiling, looking back at me. "Nazu-chan, how could you ever believe I hate you? Actually..." She looked away from me blushing hardly. "I-I love you, too."

I couldn't trust my ears anymore. Had I died somehow and went to heaven? She then looked shyly at me and smiled nervously. No, those eyes told me it was real. Those shining eyes. "Y-you do...?" I brought out. "Y-Yes!" she blushed even harder and then knelt in front of me. "Please do me the honor of being my girlfriend!" She yelled. I smiled. "Shouldn't I be the one to feel honored?" I joked. And she looked up to me begging. "Alright, please take good care of me master." Master then stood up and hugged me. I hugged her back. Touching her felt so good.

I looked at her as we stared into each other's eyes and kissed once more. It felt so great. When our lip contact broke apart I thought about something I still needed to know. "Master..." "Shou." "Huh?" "Call me Shou from now on, please. " She smiled and I blushed. "Alright...Shou." This was so weird. "Why did you give me death glares like that...? If you didn't really hate me... why did you make me feel so miserable...?" I asked. Shou looked ashamed. "Well... when I realized I had feelings for you, I first tried avoiding you, but soon noticed that wasn't possible... and at some point I noticed you sending me those special gazes and I thought you were on your way of discovering my secret. So I thought if I made you believe that I dislike you, you wouldn't discover it." I couldn't believe my master could put so much planning into that. It wasn't much, but still surprising for her.

"But you seemed to get more and more away from me and I thought that you might think about leaving. At the night that you came out of your room not that long ago, I was just sitting there, because I was thinking what to do about my love to you... I never thought you'd feel the way I did... but as I saw you ignoring me when you first left your room, I knew that I had to make sure you wouldn't leave." She noticed that? Screw the acting career. "So I decided to be extra nice to you. The perfect opportunity was when I woke up finding you in my arms..." "I.I didn't mean to end up there!" I threw in. Shou smiled and stroked my cheek. "Has anyone ever told you that you're cute when you're flustered? Because I haven't seen anything cuter than the little nervous mouse who I woke up next to." She smiled and pecked my cheek. I blushed very hardly. "So... that's basically it. I never meant to be mean to you... I'm so sorry... Oh and about Hijiri... I just talked to her so much, because she gave me advice on what to do about my strong crush on you."

"I see... so I guess I really was stupid not to trust you..." Shou shook her head. "No, no, you did nothing wrong. I was the idiot for not telling you in the first place... I always told myself I would but... then I couldn't... I admire you for bringing up the courage of doing that." I smiled a little. There had actually never been a problem if Shou would've just admitted it, but I knew it was kind of hard so it was alright. I could never be mad at her. "I couldn't stand the thought of you leaving. After all, who would've searched the pagoda for me when I lost it again...? I tried to show you that I need you earlier... You know I lost it kind of often... well, sometimes... I just wanted to show you how important you are..."

"YOU HID IT JUST TO SHOW ME A POINT? ...Thank you." tears of happiness rolled down my cheeks. "That's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me..." I hugged her and she hugged back. "I guess... everything's alright now, isn't it?" I wondered. Shou looked into my red eyes and smiled. "Yes, everything's alright now."

"Well, maybe we should get back to the others, even though they might have seen everything anyway." Both of us turned around and there weren't only the other members of the Myouren temple, but all citizens of Gensokyou watching Shou's and my quality time. "Way to go, Nazrin!" Someone in the crowd yelled, whoever it was and however she knew my name. "Shall we?" "Yes." We started to hold hands and Shou lifted the jeweled pagoda into the air. "Jeweled Pagoda:-" After we spoke half of it most of them started to try to run away. "-"Complete Clarification"" Danmaku and lasers started to fly everywhere and everyone ran as fast as they could. It was so special combining spellcards with my master and somehow so romantic.

After everyone left Shou and I stayed and watched the stars some more, holding and caressing each other lovingly.

Love, Friends, Comfort, Family. I had all of these things now and I had Shou.

Maybe I wasn't so pathetic after all.

And everyday I would whisper something into her ear starting that day.

Those few so meaningful words.

"I love you, Toramaru Shou."

* * *

And that's about it! I will post an Extra Chapter if desired^^

R&R


	6. Extra: Interesting Question

**The mouse, the tiger and the youkai jesus**

_Extra: Interesting Question_

Right after the festival, Kogasa moved in at the Myouren temple. Hijiri immediately felt sorry for her after she found out that the poor karakasa had no home. Murasa got way too drunk again, so that we had to carry her back home, Ichirin cursing all the way to the temple.

That happened some time ago. And ever since that evening master- I mean Shou's and my love has been blooming beautifully. We couldn't stand being apart anymore and would spend a lot more time together and alone than before. Kogasa had grown close to me, she was like my best friend. I could count on her and even though she failed at being scary she never gave up and that's already the spirit of a winner. Nue suggested to give her scare lessons and Kogasa gladly accepted. With both of them together no one at the Myouren temple, no.. no one in whole Gensokyou was safe.

Shou's and my relationship caused a lot of weirdness at first. It was still hard for me to call her by her first name so I tried to continue with 'master', but she corrected me every time, giving me a very sweet smile. Aaah, Shou... she sure was and is an angel. Sometimes she would get over her morning annoyance and stand up earlier just to make me special breakfast. She knows I'd do the same for her, if only I could cook. She tried to surprise me with a gift once in a while, but always managed to spill the beans before that. She'd be sad and disappointed in herself when that happened and I would cheer her up. I wouldn't like her if she was perfect and would not ruin surprises. It's the klutz I fell in love with after all.

Neither Shou nor me had ever tried anything... well... you know... . I didn't know about Shou, but I never thought about it until a few weeks ago...

All members of the Myouren temple were sitting together, drinking tea. It had gotten kind of a habit ever since we all got along better, so since Shou and I first kissed... aaah... her lips... those sweet lips... where was I? Oh, right. It had become a habit so we did it that day too. I was sitting next to Shou, resting my head on her shoulder while she rested her head on my mine. We usually didn't kiss or anything in front of others, especially not in public. It wasn't like everyone wouldn't know. They had watched us confess to each other, after all. But both of us felt uncomfortable doing all that love stuff in front of others, except our friends. So when we were outside we were still master and underling.

Anyway, I'm digressing. So that day we were sitting there as usual. Nothing special happened, just the usual chatting. Well, unless it's unusual to find an octopus-like creature in your tea. Nue was enjoying herself way too much lately. Hijiri had screamed after finding that animal. When we were all sitting there, Shou finished her tea and stood up, letting me fall to the side, because I couldn't lean on anything anymore. "umpf!" "Ah, sorry Nazu-chan!" She knelt next to me. "Are you alright? Are you hurt?" I looked at her chuckling. "Calm down, master, I'm alright." I smiled at her. "Just try to do it differently next time, please." "And you try calling me by my name next time, please." She pouted a little, but it looked like she was faking it. "Yeah... about that..." I scratched the back of my head. "Otherwise you will get no more kisses." She decided. Even though I knew she could never go through with that I had to beg now so she wouldn't be mad or sad. "No! Please reconsider and I'll call you whatever you like!" "Shou-chan." I nearly fainted.

She then giggled and kissed my forehead before standing up. "I've got to go now. I still gotta buy something." "Oh, should I come with you?" I suggested. "No! I mean... no, thank you. It's kind of... no." she smiled nervously and stepped out of the room backwards. I sat up straight again. Looked like another try to surprise me. While I drank my tea I ignored the others staring at me. I thought they'd be used to this by now. Hijiri was the only one who seemed okay with it, she was smiling happily while enjoying her tea. It was almost freaky how happy she was. Then the silence was broken. "What the hell was that?" Murasa suddenly asked. I looked at her. "You call it a tiger youkai. Maybe you haven't seen someone like that before but-" "You know what I meant." I smiled a little bit. "What do you want me to say? You saw what happened, I don't know more than you do." Murasa didn't seem satisfied, not at all. Ichirin raised her voice. "Murasa, just let them be, are you aggressive today or something?" She asked calmly. The captain sighed. "No. But... there's stuff you DO know that I don't know." she turned her gaze back to me, locking her eyes on mine, I'm sure this is how she used to target the ships she was going to sink.

"And what would that be?" "How far have Shou and you gone?" She blurted out. I tried to stay calm at that question, but I couldn't and so I spat out my tea into Kogasa's face. "blurg!" she said. "What's with that kind of question?" I asked loudly. "I just wanna know!" Hijiri interrupted. "Please, both of you calm down, no one here wants to be deaf." We calmed down. "Both of you disappear into her or your room and no one knows what you're doing, so spill it!" She ordered. "That's seriously none of your business." I said calmly. "Oh, so you two have already-" "I never said that!" I interrupted her. Murasa chuckled. "I never knew you would do that kind of stuff so quickly." I blushed very hard. "I didn't say we did!" "A-ha! You're blushing! Memories coming to your mind?" she asked jokingly, but for me it wasn't funny at all. "No! Because there aren't any like that! You pervert captain!"

"Should I try bero bero ba now, Nue-senpaii?" - "No. Not now. Not ever." I heard the quiet dialogue next to me. Oh yeah, since Nue is teaching Kogasa how to scare someone my friend's been starting to call her senpai. Ichirin sighed annoyed. "Murasa, just stop it. If you wanna ask her stuff like that do it either quietly or not now." She took a zip from her tea and Murasa got quieter while talking. "Well if you haven't had anything like what you think what I think what you think you did, how far did you go then?" She asked. It wasn't anything of her business. She shouldn't care. But she was way too stubborn to even think of giving up on trying. "Well... we kissed that one time... ." I answered her.

"...That's it? You don't even kiss her regularly? You haven't even made out a little?" She asked. "No..." I said. Why did I have to say that in front of everyone there? "Of course I thought I could try making out a little, but... I can't. I still have troubles calling her by her name, how on earth should it be possible for me to do something like that?" I asked more myself than her. "Well, I guess that makes sense. But we gotta change that!" "What?" I started blankly at her.

"But I like it the way it is!"

**Prepare for the sequel: The mouse, the tiger and the Palaquin captain**

"**Now that you two are together, you need to get closer!"**

Thanks to Anonymous Pyramid Head, who read and commented all the time! I'd be happy to have you read the sequel^^


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